Wednesday, May 5, 2010


I have two things that are rather bothersome to me at the moment, and since I love to share...
The first bothersome thing is something(or things to be more accurate) that I have been inflicted with for years. Insomnia - sometimes I get mild patches where I lose a couple of hours sleep a night. Although this is annoying, it is manageable. Then I get the real bad kind, where i get about 2 or if I am lucky 3 hours sleep a night. This worse variety causes the second something - panic attacks. I first started getting these when I started going to University and I was suffering from lack of sleep due to writing essays in the middle of the night. The first time I had one I thought I was dying, I thought there was no way your heart could race that fast without some serious damage (plus I had no idea it was a panic attack or even what they were) I usually get these in the middle of the night when I am suffering from lack of sleep - they are scary, even though I know what they are, and sometimes I still feel like I could die (this is mostly cause adrenaline is pumping around my body at a phenomenal rate and it does not make my brain think clearly) I hate when this happens cause I get worried another one will happen and then it becomes a viscous circle. I need distraction right up until the moment I fall asleep otherwise my stupid little brain can work itself up into one.
One thing that has been distracting me lately, and is perhaps something I should have been thinking about at night instead of panic attacks, is the mysterious smell in my car. I have been on the hunt for this mysterious smell for days. I thought I had located it once when I found a container with some dodgy looking food in it. Happily I discarded it thinking I would finally have a car that didn't want to make me vomit when I hopped in, no longer would I have to wind down the windows on a freezing morning while I drove to work in a vain attempt at breathing non stench laden air. But alas, you see where this story is going, it turned out not to be the source of the smell. Then I was momentarily happy again when I found a stain on a mat, but that also turned out to be nothing but a harmless non-odourous mark. Then tonight as I was driving home, windows down, plug in air freshner on full blast I glanced over the back and saw a very thick, brown ominous stain on a blanket that had been brought into the car just over a week ago. I wanted to sing, dance and puke when I got home to discover it was cat poo(or possibly vomit, hard to tell)Mystery solved! Now I only wonder how long the smell will hang around, how much of it has forever permeated its way into the seat coverings?


  1. Tony Soprano (Sopranos HBO) suffered from panic attacks similar to what you describe. He killed people and probably transported them in the boot of his car. Have you checked your boot re scouce of smell?

  2. Ah, Fflur, panic attacks are no fun. You take care to get enough rest.

  3. Happy to report no bodies in my boot and I have gotten rid of the smell. Sadly it has travelled to somewhere in the kitchen.