Today I was informed by facebook that the last of my friends from high school is getting married. Bugger, she has left me all alone in the horrid world of singledom to become one of the smug married. I feel like Will Smith's character in I am Legend when he is the only person left of the planet - I am the only one left on planet single and the horrible deformed people that I have to fight off are either all those bloody married or partnered up types or my own fears of being single (have not decided on that part of the analogy yet) I would like it better if I was not battling my own demons. I know I may complain about being single a lot but there is a bloody good reason for it, in fact more than one! I won't bore you with the details but if anyone knows the direct dial number or the email address of cupid, mother nature, God...or anyone in the know, I would like to contact them so I can lodge a formal complaint. It would go something like this...
Dear God,
what the fuck??? Please amend urgently, any single men considered.
Yours gratefully,
Fflur
Sorry to be pedantic, but I don't think that God approves of swearing.
ReplyDeleteJust a small point.
Oh, and another thing, I don't think that your time zone (on your blog) is set up correctly. Was your post really written at 10.39pm? Isn't that the sort of time when one should be out looking for a single man?
ReplyDeleteDear Richard (of RBB) I was trying to get God's attention by swearing, he does not seem to be listening when I speak nicely. Also, how does one change ones time zone? and does one care if ones time zone is wrong? Lastly, I have given up looking, I hear if you wait they will come to you (or some bollocks like that)
ReplyDeleteIt'll happen, you have plenty of time. Believe it or not there are a lot of nice men out there.
ReplyDeleteOf which Comeinyourpants is not one.
ReplyDeleteFflur, I'll try to keep an eye out for nice young men.
ReplyDeleteHehehhe but there's no MIL to worry about!!
ReplyDeleteThanks Richard but I have known you for quite a few years now and you have not found me anyone yet - past behaviour is the best predictor of present behaviour - which I think may indicate you are lying (about 'keeping an eye out' for someone) to make me feel better.
ReplyDeleteOne problem might be asking God for help. His previous record with women hasn't been too good.
ReplyDelete- John-Paul
Maybe God has one of those mysterious reasons of His for keeping Fflur single? Nunhood?
ReplyDeleteNunhood!!!!! surely there could be a more exciting reason for my single status
ReplyDelete