Saturday, August 21, 2010

12 - neither teen nor child

Some ways to identify your 12 year old is almost a teen:
1. Body odour is beginning to make its presence felt
2. Your child no longer does the naked dance when he gets out of the shower (phew)
3. Pimples start to appear overnight onto your child's once silky smooth skin.
4. Small hairs around the corner of your child's mouth start to turn a darker colour (please note this only happens if your child is a boy, at least I hope so)
5. You suddenly become the embodiment of embarrassment if you are within 12 meters of your child in public
6. Your child's friends opinions carry a lot more weight than your own, even if their opinions are downright farcical

Some ways to tell your 12 year old is still a child:
1. They still come in for a cuddle in the morning
2. They still talk to the cat in a baby voice
3. They are not smart enough yet to lie or deceive you with any conviction

Case in point - Bennett was banned from the computer this weekend. I thought he was being remarkably mature about it all as he had not complained once about having nothing to do (in fact his kind of annoyed me as I thought if he was not suffering it could not be a decent punishment) However, this morning when I got out of the shower I then went to the computer to have a little look at my facebook, and there in black and white was evidence that my son is not yet smart enough to trick me - he had been on the computer while I was in the shower and had "liked" a page on facebook, not thinking about how this would pop up on my newsfeed (now for people like Richard who do not understand facebook talk all this means is he was just not smart or deceitful enough yet to be a teen -for which I am truly thankful (and he is not because now he has a extra day of being banned)


  1. Oh Fflur,
    you are in for such a treat!
    The next symptom is that the body odour concentrates in the feet, and produces an aroma, the rankness of which can be compared to a combination of 5 year old Gorgonzola and a bucket of rotting fish guts.

    It's nice to know that Bennett is at such an early stage of male adolescent evolution that he still actually listens to you, that he even acknowledges that you have such a thing as an opinion.

    As far a the computer incident is concerned, do you think that just one extra day being banned is enough?
    I don't advocate going to the extreme as that pseudo-Scotsman suggests, but I would have banned him for a week.

    Oh poor innocent little Fflur, have you heard of a thing called a password?
    Set one on your computer ASAP, not just to dissuade Bennett from cheating, but it also a first line of defence against hackers.

  2. My 24 year son is still going through the smelly sock stage.

  3. Dear Twisted,
    I hear your advice but I feel like a weeks ban would actually just be a punishment to me. He has other punishments to keep him going for the remainder of the week, ones that are less taxing on me. Smelly socks have already graced us with their presence gran's remedy is already in force.

  4. We have a substance in The States called Old Unca' Craw's Medicinal Elixir. Sure as hell does work on smelly sox!

  5. Fflur, you come across as an intelligent woman. I like that.

  6. This post is older, and now about as relevant, as the old bloody testament.

  7. Pardon me for asking but, is this your last post ever?

  8. Hello Fflur, I've really missed you. Come back to Nuova Lazio and rule at my side. With my brains and charisma, and your beauty we would make an unbeatable team.
    Come back, I've got the butter and maple syrup ready.